Emergency Room

Well we had a real scare this morning with Rylin. She was laying in our bed with Dustin and he fell asleep and Rylin took a tumble off of our bed. I was downstairs and that was the loudest bang ever. I ran upstairs, she was crying and I took her from Dustin. When I was holding her she all of a sudden blacked out and turned purple. I was trying to get her to open her eyes. She would a few times open her eyes a little and then they would just shut again. I seriously thought she was dead or dying. I was yelling to Dustin to call 911. Then she came out of it and we layed her down. She was ghostly white. She soon started acting normal again. We called the doctor on call and she said that even though she is acting fine now the going purple and blacking out could happen again and we needed to go to the ER right away, don't wait. So we met my mom at Macey's store on the way and gave Macie to her. At the ER the doctor told us he thinks she passed out from crying so hard and I told him I didn't think so because she has cried a lot harder and longer than that before, like just last night she screamed blood murder because I was trying to get her to go to bed in her crib on her own. But he told us to watch her closely today and that he thought doing a CAT SCAN right now would be a mistake because of all the radiation, etc. He said she wasn't showing any signs of head trauma and that if she did later then we would do a CAT SCAN. Hopefully she is fine and nothing else will happen with it. It makes me nervous because I know people where they have hit their head and seem fine and then a few hours later all goes south. Hopefully that isn't the case here.
Really bad scare today. I thought my baby was gone. I told Dustin if she went, he'd have to send me too. So thankful she seems just fine and keep praying she stays fine.

Changing foods

So I have been doing weight watchers for a few weeks now and am happy to say I have lost over 6 pounds. But along with doing this I eat a lot better than I used to. One way I have changed my food is I buy anything whole wheat that I can. I love whole wheat tortillas, spaghetti noodles, and last night we had brown rice too. I can hardly taste a difference in them. I have also started making my sandwiches out of these whole wheat bagels I buy from sam's club. It makes me feel a lot better that I am making this change from white enriched flour products. If you haven't tried it, do it.

My baby Rylin is 1 year old!

So I never really wrote down the story of Rylin's birth because soon after she was born our lives were turned upside down with her health problems. I figure today, on her 1st birthday, would be a great time to go back and recap the things I remember about her birthday. Warning, this is long and detailed.

My water broke in the middle of the night just like Macie but this time I didn't make it to the bathroom and it was a lot of water, A LOT OF WATER!!! I didn't realize such a thing was possible. We were living in my Grandma and Grandpa Jackson's home at the time. I remember sitting up and then the gushing began and telling Dustin what was happening and yelling for him to get me a towel or something. I remember being so panicked and saying I'm not ready for this, I'm not ready. She was three weeks early. I had been telling people she would be but I was actually right. We didn't even have a car seat yet. We had just went car seat shopping the day before and found one we liked but decided to keep looking for a better deal. I hadn't pulled out her clothes, nothing, nada, zip. Thankfully my brother Matt and his family were living in the basement at the time and Dustin went downstairs and told them we were going to the hospital and they said they would watch Macie. I remember I had to go and ask Bobbie for a video camera tape because that was still on my to do list that I hadn't gotten to yet. Thankfully they had that as well. I was starting to have contractions by this point and I was telling Dustin we need to go and that I didn't want to have this baby at home. I had just heard a story about someone that had their baby in the car on the way to hospital and I just wasn't up for that.

When we got to the hospital they did all the regulars and got us in the room. Of course I wanted an epidural and I waited for awhile to have it. I remember feeling all the contractions and they really hurt and I wasn't even dilated very far yet. When the guy came to give me my epidural I was ready for it, it always makes me really nervous because I have a real fear of needles. This time was much, much worse than expected though. The guy numbed me and that wasn't bad but then he tried to put in the epidural and everytime he did a nerve on one side of my spine just shot out pain. I would jump and you are not supposed to do that. I was trying to hold still as best I could but I couldn't because it kept hitting a nerve. The anesthesiologist kept giving me more and more numbing shots but it just wouldn't work. Eventually we got it or at least thought we did.

After that I was expecting an easy ride but for some reason one side of me just wouldn't get numb. I was feeling every contraction because of that one side and I was in a lot of pain. Plus with the catherter they had in me it was also really agitating me making me feel like I had a UTI. I felt like ripping every IV out of me and just running from the hospital like that would make the pain stop. The nurses just said to wait and see if it would get better and that they would let the anesthesiologist know. I was so annoyed and a bit angry with Dustin too because he was just interested in watching whatever sports were on TV or so it seemed, instead of giving me any comfort.

Finally after awhile the anesthesiologist came back and this time they gave me a spinal tap. I felt immediate relief and was so much better after that. Once I was able to relax I dilated a lot faster too. My doctor was Fowers. Normally my doctor is Barry Noorda but for both of my kids he was gone on vacation so Fowers delivered both Macie and Rylin. We really like both of them a lot. So Fowers came and saw me earlier in the day and said he was going to church and he would be back later to check on me. It was probably around 11am when the nurse checked me and I think I was dilated to a 7. About 5 minutes after she left I felt like I needed to push really bad or have a bowel movement kind of feeling. I was trying to hold it back as best I could. After a few minutes I paged the nurse and she said my nurse was helping someone and could I wait. I told her I felt like I needed to push really bad. She immediately said okay we'll be right in. Luckily Fowers came right at that time too, because the nurse checked me and I was dilated to a ten and I was trying so hard not to push. They just kept telling me to hold on while they were getting themselves and the room ready.

When I did get to start pushing I was a little more nervous because I could feel some of it. With Macie I was completely numb to all of it. I only pushed for about 20 minutes before Rylin was born. I remember once her head came out it was immediate relief but then I started panicking because I knew that coming next was her shoulders and I was feeling it. It went fast though and didn't hurt too bad. They actually handed Rylin to me after she was born, they didn't do that with Macie. She was so bluish/purple. Soon after they took her from me though and cleaned her up.

Rylin's skin was so, so, so, red in the hospital. She looked like she could have indian skin or had spent a lot of time in the sun for several days after she was born. She was such a beautiful baby.

When Dustin blessed her, the one thing that really stuck out to me was that he blessed her to be a peace maker in our home and she truly is. I have never known any child to be so happy and content. We love her and are so blessed and happy she is with us. For awhile after she was born we didn't know what would happen with her health. Heavenly Father has blessed her and us. I remember talking to Dustin one night about what he has learned or taken from the experience and I told him that I have learned I am a lot stronger than I thought I was.

I have really gained an understanding and compassion for people whose children have health issues.

Both of my kids have sat quietly in my arms after they were born and we just stare at each other. I know they knew my voice right away. Rylin was wide awake. I always wondered how I would be able to love another child as much as I loved Macie and that worry was gone right away. There is always room to love your children with an amazing and unconditional love you never knew was possible.

Today Rylin seems to be completely free of any problems she had with reflux and is doing so well. We love you Rylin and can't express how much we love having you in our lives!!!